The Santa Claus Lie

Why does society condone lying to the kids?

My son turns 3 years old this year. He now fully understands everything we say. When strangers ask him if he'll be a good boy for Santa, he remembers. He's got to be wondering who this Santa person is. And I don't want to lie to him.

What to do? I can't tell him Santa doesn't exist. I'll get notes from school that my little boy trampled other kids' fantasies and other parents will come beat me.

I can't simply leave out gifts from Santa. My son will wonder why Santa hates him and will think he's a bad boy. He'll spend years in therapy overcoming his plummeted self-esteem.

I can't join the Santa hype. When he finds out the truth, he'll question everything we've ever told him. Right will become wrong; up will become down; and my son will become a psychopath who cannot trust anyone.

Ok, maybe I'm overreacting. But this Santa thing will definitely undermine one thing in my house: I've convinced my son that our locked front door keeps monsters from getting into the house. Santa's breaking-and-entering via chimney is sure to screw that up.

Oh well. Maybe I'll embrace our materialistic, delusional society's tradition and make it work for me. The next time my son refuses to eat dinner I'll tell him that Santa will drop lumps of coal on his eyes while he sleeps. And he'd better go to bed or the elves will get him. At least he'll be well-behaved.

Mike Conway December 07, 2011 at 05:55 PM
"Hoping Santa can bring her a clue" is certainly the sort of comment that embodies what Christmas is all about. Might I respectfully suggest that this piece is tongue-in-cheek?
Bryan Hughes December 10, 2011 at 04:27 PM
If this is an attempt to post an Onion-like article on Patch, I recommend the author stop trying.
Becky Woodward December 13, 2011 at 02:33 AM
Love it! Relax people it was meant to be funny! Poke fun at us crazy moms and our crazy thoughts about the silliest of things! We moms tend to go through this thought process when confronted with these life altering issues! Love these articles by Nicole! I can totally relate as a mom of 4 myself! Thanks for the reminder to just go with the flow!
Nicole Skuba December 14, 2011 at 02:25 PM
Hi all, Thanks for the comments, even those of you who hated the article! I had a happy childhood, Cindy. Santa was a part of it. That kinda hurt, Bryan, but I'm glad you chimed in. And very big THANKS to Mike and Becky. I'm definitely joking with the extremity of my words. Becky is right, though. This is the silly course my brain took while considering the involvement of Santa in my child's life. I'm poking fun at parental insanity - mainly my own. Happy Holidays!
marian December 22, 2011 at 08:16 PM
I know my response comes a little late, but I totally agree with you. I found out I was pregnant during Christmas a few years ago and now have a three yr old that my husband and I promised we would never lie to (1st time parents, can you tell?!) We avoided Santa for her 1st few yrs, but now that she is a member of a preschool society and the topic of Santa keeps coming up, we decided to just go with the flow. We now said that we will never use Santa to get her to do good things, ie-"behave or Santa won't bring you anything". We'll see how long that lasts :-) Really enjoy your column


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